I am about to leave. 

And as I push down the excitement of heading to Guatemala with a group from the church- try to dial back the vibration of anticipation and put into perspective the anxiety that preoccupies me- I find myself thinking about what it is to leave.

I think about the spectrum of leavings- for a visit, for a job or education, for a fresh start, for escape, for pilgrimage. Leaving is often motivated by safety or desperation (love or fear) though I can see that sometimes there is both. I think about the people who have been forced to leave because of war or persecution in my lifetime... try to wrap my head around the sheer volume of humanity forced to leave in the last decade alone and I wonder where is God in all of this? Is any of this mine to take up?

I am leaving for just a little while, with an itinerary laid out before me so that all I have to do is see, and hear, and smell and taste. There are people wishing me a safe journey as pilots are starting their pre-flight checks. I am stocking the fridge for my kids just as there are hotels preparing for my arrival. The balance of me preparing to go and others preparing for me to arrive is about to shift. And then there will be another shift and I will be leaving Guatemala. What will shift in me in the leavings?

I am leaving.

I am motivated by love.

And God is in all of this.


(watch for pics and posts here and on Facebook over the next few weeks, depending on availablility of wifi!)